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Evan Marc Katz, a dating coach in Los Angeles, has heard it all.

Specializing in women and online love, Katz thinks that most women get it wrong.

I would love to read an expansion of this, specifically advice to women in the face of it.

One way to go is of course to say bye bye baby to the guy who doesn ‘t have the sense to stop shopping in the face of your fabulousness.

There are dating sites devoted to particular religious groups, like Christian Mingle or JDate, for example, as well as sites that cater to gay and lesbian daters. This removes a lot of the ambiguity that you face when you meet an interesting person at a work event or a party. Because of the ease and relative anonymity of online dating sites, we may take more risk reaching out to people we would not approach in person.

And even though men generally contact women more than vice versa on these sites, research has shown that a sizable minority of women do reach out to men they find desirable online, suggesting that these sites allow some women to overcome traditional gender norms that cast them in a passive role of waiting to be approached (Scharlott & Christ, 1995). Shy or socially anxious individuals often have difficulty forming and maintaining close relationships (Alden & Taylor, 2004; Davila & Beck, 2002).

Anyway, first I just wanted to say that you do excellent work, and that your perspective is very helpful (mine is that of a widowed 50ish woman — and though of course there are similarities across the dating world, different demographics are, well … Quoting from you: “Online dating has leveled the playing field for guys to an unhealthy point.I ‘m not saying it ‘s a good thing, but it ‘s not a crime.Plenty of nice men are dazzled with the array of beauty on dating sites and feel that they should just keep shopping.”Very, very well said and very true.“I call it the ‘Human Shopping Network,’” said Kevin.“You get addicted to it.” Still, for all the choices, dating online — or offline — can be tough.

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